Language III

So the key seems to be that you need to make it clear that as you are muddling through, you are asking them to bear with your sorry language skills because you are trying to learn, not because you are trying to get something done.  I've had much more favorable reactions when I ask what the word is.  "Poss to lene?" (what is it called?) Is my friend. 

I channel Ellie, who says to me, "Mommy, I want the shirt I wore tomorrow with the almost circles with lots of colors" (the shirt she wore yesterday with the rainbows on it).  Ellie is using the words she has (and her very analytical mind) to describe the things for which she has no word.  My role in that interaction is to listen carefully and make a picture in my head so I can identify (and name) the shirt for her.  Now I am in her position, saying "I want the thing that is round that sticks things together" (tape).  When I just say that, I'm asking them to work very hard to puzzle out what I'm trying to say (and as Mom who translates Ellie, I know that it is work!).  But when I add "poss to lene" I make it clear that I'm asking them to do work not so I can get scotch tape, but so I can learn the word, too.  I've tried that strategy a few times, and I generally get a very friendly response.  People like being put in the role of teacher, and it softens them towards me.  Today I tried that in the grocery store, and it sparked a whole conversation about learning foreign languages (the shopkeeper's English is pretty good) and then she told me that they have a free delivery service (the word we were struggling with was heavy, as I'd bought potatoes, milk, juice, soda and oranges, making for a very heavy bag (varus).